Chapter Six: If I Lose Myself

Hey everyone! Sorry for the long time with no update. I finished school in May and then I was taking summer classes and I just got done with them last week. So I took that time to finish what I had started writing when I’d posted the previous chapter. I tried to make this a little longer than what I normally would to make up for the long wait.

Yes, there are finally some good lemons in this chapter. Sorry for the long wait, but I wanted to build up to it and build up I did.

Fun fact, this chapter is named after the One Republic song If I Lose Myself, for obvious reasons. I hope you enjoy this.

Here’s just a little recap:

Eric is a photographer that meets Sookie on a plane. He asks her out for drinks which causes her to spend the night at his place. She takes a cab in the morning to her friend Pam and Jessica’s apartment. Sookie gets drunk and we find out why she and her boyfriend break. Pam and Jess throw a party for Sookie’s birthday, and we find out that Eric is the guy she had in mind for Sookie, but they already know one another. The party commences and Sookie and Eric banter and the sexual tension is building up between them. Eric has just offered Sookie a job as his intern for the summer which she accepts. They just sealed the deal with a kiss..


If I Lose Myself: One Republic

“Yep.” Sookie popped the p. “Unless you can think of anything else.” Sookie took her drink and went out to the living room. She silently laughed at her flirting with Eric. She could still see the stunned look on his face when she left him. All I needed when I spoke was to be sucking on a lollipop. Sookie walked over to Pam. Pam was talking to a petite girl with brown hair. She was cute, and looked like Pam’s type. “Hey Pammie.” Sookie giggled as she made her presence known to her best friend.

“Sookie, you know you were never supposed to call me that ever again.” Pam said with wide eyes.

Sookie smirked. “Hi, I’m Sookie.” She smiled to the girl next to Pam. “Pam must of forgotten her manners, since she didn’t introduce us.”

“Hey, I’m Amelia. I work with Jessica.” Amelia smiled. “I love your dress. You look completely gorgeous!” Amelia gushed.

“She does look very appetizing.” Pam smiled at Sookie with a gleeful look on her face. “Maybe Eric has some ideas for the two of you.” Pam motioned with her eyes for Sookie to go away. It’s one thing when she has no one to hook up with and she pussy blocks me. But when she has a guy who is drooling over her and she annoys me! That is beyond what I want her to do.

Sookie laughed at her friend. “Oh Pam.” Sookie walked away from her. She went over to Alcide who was sitting on the couch texting on his phone. “Hey.”

“What’s up birthday girl?” Alcide looked past her. “Where’s Eric? I thought you two were inseparable.”

Sookie smiled, trying to hide the blush that was appearing on her face. “I left him standing in the kitchen. He seemed to be in shock so I thought it’d be best if he had some time to himself.”

Alcide laughed. “Did you stun him silent? I’ve never seen Eric stumped before. Was it good?”

“I stumped him using sex. It was worth it.” Sookie laughed.

“Sookie, that was cruel. You can’t do that to Northman.” Alcide smiled. “You know that he’s excited to spend more time with you this summer?”

“I thought Pam asked him to ask me?”

“She did, but knowing Eric he was already thinking about it.” Alcide looked towards Eric. “You two are going to be an interesting duo. Not to mention the fact that you both are gonna be back in New York when the summer ends.”

“So everyone thinks that we are going to make it past the summer?”

“I wouldn’t say that, because I am drunk, but if anyone in the room didn’t know the two of you they’d think that you were in a relationship. From what I can tell you like him, he like’s you.” He took a sip of beer. “Does it matter what everyone else thinks? Isn’t the fact that you and Eric are happy enough for you.”

“I don’t care what other people think. I like Eric, Eric knows it, you know it, Pam and Jessica know it. I just haven’t been thinking past this summer. I don’t know what my future looks like.” Sookie sat back on the couch.

“Just don’t hurt him. I know we should be having this conversation at a later time in our friendship, but I can’t deal with a moping Eric. He stops showering, and then that leads to letting go of any personal hygiene.”

Sookie laughed. “Well I really didn’t have any plans to break his heart. I think he might have a chance of breaking mine before I break his.”

Alcide nodded. “So do you think that you can help me with something?” Sookie nodded. “I’ve been texting this girl, we’ve gone out a few times, I want her to come tonight, but she says she doesn’t know anybody here and would feel out of place.”

“If she really liked you, she’d come here even if she didn’t know who your friends were.” Sookie paused. “Ask her to get lunch one day, talk about where you want this to go. Lunch isn’t as intimidating as dinner, she’ll be more open to talking.”

“Thanks birthday girl.” Alcide smiled.

“I’m gonna go find Eric. I think I’ve left him by himself too long.” Sookie finished the rest of her drink and went back to the kitchen. She made another drink, a bit stronger than what she normally made, which were already pretty strong. Sookie went outside to the porch to get some fresh air, before searching for Eric.


“AH!” Sookie screamed. Her drink went flying out of her hand, as the other went immediately to her heart. She looked to the direction where the voice came from. Eric was sitting on a chair with a beer in one hand and the other behind his head. Eric had a smile on his face, trying to hide his laughter. “What are you doing out here?”

“Enjoying the fresh Seattle air.” He put his bottle down and pulled a pack of cigarette’s from his pocket. “Want one?” Sookie nodded. “Come here then.” Sookie stood in front of him. “Sit.” He gestured to his lap.

Sookie sat down, getting comfortable on him. “What do you smoke?”

“Marlboro menthols.” He handed one to her.

“Is it strange that I find you a little more attractive since I know you smoke?” Sookie blushed.

“Not at all.”

“The only thing you’d need from my list is a piercing.” She smiled. “Then you’d have a perfect score.”

Eric laughed. “Well you have everything on my list.”

“Which is?”

“Beautiful, tattoo’s, a really great rack, and an ass that I could stare at all day.” He leaned close and whispered, “Not to mention the fact that I saw that you had your nipple pierced. That is hot as fuck.” He nipped her ear.

“So do you have any piercings?” Sookie asked with a smile on her face.

“No, but you’re making me reconsider getting one.” He laughed.

Sookie took the lighter from Eric and lit her cigarette. “So why didn’t you smoke last night?”

“I try not to when I’m trying to impress a girl.”

“What’s different about tonight and last night?”

“Well right now I am so drunk that I know I shouldn’t be encouraging you to smoke.”

Sookie inhaled her cigarette. “I mainly smoke when I’m drunk.” She tossed the butt on the ground and stepped on it with her shoe.

“You look hot as fuck tonight. I feel the need to tell you that.” Eric’s hands wrapped around her waist.

“Thank you.” She breathed out. She shifted in Eric’s lap. “You look like a GQ model.”

Eric smiled. “Only if I get to model exclusively for you.” Eric moved closer to Sookie. “I really wanna kiss you.”

“What’s stopping you?” Sookie moved closer to Eric.

“The distance between us.” Eric closed the distance and kissed Sookie. She tasted like tequila. Sookie moaned in to his mouth. Eric took the opportunity and began to explore her mouth. Sookie gripped his shirt. Their tongues danced until Eric had to pull away from Sookie to breathe. Sookie began to kiss Eric’s neck. She lightly bit his neck. Eric moaned a the sensation her mouth was causing. Sookie kissed her way to his ear, nipping it. Eric guided Sookie’s lips back to his. Sookie sucked on Eric’s bottom lip, eliciting a growl from Eric. Eric’s hands roamed up her sides, stopping at her breasts. Sookie gasped and moaned in his ear at the contact. His thumbs circled her nipples; making them harder.

“Eric.” Sookie said in a breathless voice. “We need to go back to your place right now.”

Eric nodded. “We do.” His eyes got darker with the idea of having Sookie in his bed without anything on, her in ecstasy underneath him.

Sookie stood up pulling Eric with her. She could see the bulge in his pants. I know he’s big, but my memory has to be failing me. Sookie bit her bottom lip, before licking her lips. She pulled Eric to her, giving him a kiss that left both of them breathless.

“God Sookie, do you have any idea what you’re doing to me right now?” He moaned.

“This is why we need to get back to your place. Unless you want me to pull you in to a closet, and in that case we are going to have to get crafty.” Sookie laughed.

Eric rubbed himself against Sookie. “My place now.” He growled in her ear.

Sookie nodded. “Lead the way.” She giggled. Eric pulled Sookie through the party.

“Eric there you are!” Pam called out.

Eric and Sookie stopped in their tracks. “Yes Pam?” He responded.

“Were you going without saying goodbye?” Pam asked. “I know the look in your eyes right now. You two are going to fuck like rabbits when you leave here. Use protection. I don’t wanna be an aunt.”

Sookie blushed and laughed. “Goodnight Pam.” Sookie pulled Eric out the door. “You’re calling a cab right?”

“Yes.” Eric nodded, with the phone to his ear. “Cab should be here in fifteen minutes.”

“And what are we supposed to do with all of the spare time that we have?” Sookie raised an eyebrow. Eric didn’t respond with words, he pulled Sookie to him guiding his lips back to hers. Sookie pulled back when she needed to breathe. “God Eric, I can’t wait to feel you inside me.” She whispered in his ear.

Eric growled. “This cab better get here soon before I fuck you on these steps.” Sookie smiled at the idea. “You’d like that wouldn’t you? Do you get off on the idea of people catching us?” He pulled her closer to him. He nipped her ear. “I can’t wait to have you underneath me, watching my cock disappear inside you.”

Sookie licked her lips. “It’s a good thing the cab’s here then isn’t it?” She winked. They walked to the cab. Sookie slid in first with Eric following her, telling the cab driver the address. He kept his hand on her thigh. His finger tips were tracing patterns in to her skin, causing goosebumps to appear on her skin. The cab pulled up to Eric’s apartment, he paid the cab driver and they quickly got out. Getting to Eric’s apartment as fast as possible.

Eric opened the door as quick as possible, pulling Sookie inside with him closing the door with his foot. He backed Sookie up against the wall, lifting her by her thighs. Sookie squealed, but moaned when his mouth was on hers. Sookie wrapped her legs around him. Eric ground his hips in to hers. Sookie could feel his denim clad erection. Every time he swiveled his hips, he would hit just the right spot and she would moan in his mouth. Sookie’s hands moved from his shoulders to his hair gently tugging.

God she’s amazing, Eric thought. Sookie broke the kiss and began kissing his neck, gently biting, increasing the pressure making Eric moan. She can leave whatever kind of mark on me she wants on me, he smiled. Eric’s hands moved to her phenomenal ass, his large hands kneading it, becoming very acquainted.

“Eric,” Sookie moaned “you need to either bring me to a couch or a bed because I want to see more of your body. Right now!”

“Anything you want.” He carried her to the bedroom. Gently tossing her on the bed.

Sookie sat up leaning on her elbows. “You are wearing entirely too much clothing.”

“Should I model for you like I promised?” Eric said with a large smile. Sookie nodded eagerly. Eric slowly removed his shirt, revealing his toned six pack.

Sookie’s mouth opened form an O. “Is there a reason that you even wear clothes?” She licked her lips.

“Well if I didn’t I don’t think you’d ever let me out of this room.”

Sookie used her finger to beckon him closer. She ran her hands down his hard, toned chest, reveling in the feeling of his body underneath her hands. “You should never wear a shirt around me ever again.” Sookie’s hands went to his belt. She undid it and watched as they fell to the ground.

Eric smiled. He rarely wore boxers. At the surprise on Sookie’s face, his smile grew. “See something you like?” The smirk was wiped off his face when she wrapped a hand around his hard dick.

“Yes.” She smirked, stroking his dick slowly.

Eric moved her hand. “We need to get you out of this dress first.” He pulled her up, unzipping the back of her dress. She stepped out of it, keeping her heels on. He moved hair away from her neck. “You are so fucking sexy it hurts.” His hands crept down her body, he undid her black bra with ease. His hands ghosted up her sides until he reached her breasts. His fingers teased her nipples .

Sookie moaned. “Feel good?” Eric smirked at what he was doing to her. Eric began kissing down her neck. He kissed down her chest, taking one of her nipples in his mouth. He gently sucked on it, his tongue flicking the tip.

Sookie moaned louder. Her fingers wove in his hair keeping his head there. “Fuck!” Sookie moaned, “Bite harder.”

Eric smiled around her nipple. He bit her nipple harder and Sookie gasped then moaned louder at the sensation that he was causing. He tugged on her nipple, before moving to the other. His hands ghosted down her sides, he reached her panties and ripped them off.

Sookie looked up at him. “Did you just do that?” She said in a breathy tone.

Eric nodded around her nipple, bitting just a bit harder. Eric’s fingers move towards Sookie’s center. His fingers gently rubbed her lower lips seeing if she was ready. He found that she was extremely wet. He easily slid a finger inside of her, discovering that she was tight. Eric moaned around her nipple.

Sookie pulled his head away from her chest, causing him to pull at her nipple, making her gasp. She guided his lips back to hers. Eric began pumping his fingers at a steady pace. Sookie moaned in his mouth. She pulled back for a moment. “Oh god add another please.”

Eric smiled and obliged. Two fingers in her were a tight fit, but she was wet enough that he easily slid his fingers inside her. He curled his fingers and found the spot in her that Bill had never been able to find. She screamed when he kept rubbing it. Her walls began to tighten around his fingers, so tight that he could barely move them.

Sookie screamed out. Eric removed his fingers from her and licked them clean. Sookie came down from her high with a smile.

“God you’re amazing.” Sookie wrapped her arms around him and kissed him hard.

“You can call me Eric.” He smirked. He smiled when he felt Sookie’s hand travel down his body. He gasped when he felt Sookie wrap her hand around him. She stroked him for a moment before Eric stopped her. “As much as I don’t want you to stop-”

“Then don’t stop me.” Sookie reached to stroke Eric.

“Hey, it’s been a while for me, if you don’t stop now, it’s gonna be over before it’s even started.”

Sookie smiled at Eric, before she kissed him. “Do you have a condom?”

Eric momentarily removed himself from her and began searching for his pants. He pulled a condom from his pocket. He held it up smiling triumphantly.

“Did you think you were going to get lucky tonight?” Sookie said with a smile.

Eric laughed. He climbed back on the bed hovering over her. “No,” he kissed her shoulder. “but I was hoping that I’d eventually have a reason to use it with you.” he sat back for a moment, quickly rolling on the condom.

Sookie pulled Eric back to her. He kissed her taking his time. Sookie took the initiative and placed him at her entrance. Eric moved slowly until he was fully inside her. He waited a moment to let Sookie adjust and for himself to calm down. Sookie started to move her hips to get Eric to move. He pulled back util just the tip was inside her, then slammed back in to her. He repeated the process until Sookie was begging him to fuck her properly.

Eric fucked Sookie at a steady pace. Sookie’s lips attached to Eric’s neck nipping and sucking so hard Eric was positive she was going to leave a mark. Eric flipped them so Sookie was on top

Sookie took control. She rested her hands on Eric’s chest. Her hips rose up and down in a fast pace. Every few moments on the down stroke, she would sway and swivel her hips causing her and Eric both to groan. Eric rested his hands on Sookie’s hips. Sookie moved them to her chest. Eric began playing with her nipples. Pinching them hard, causing Sookie’s walls to tighten around Eric.

Eric groaned. “Sookie you feel so fucking amazing.” Eric pinched her nipples harder, this time gently pulling.

“Eric!” Sookie moaned loudly. “IF you keep doing that I am gonna cum all over your dick.”

Eric smiled, pinching her nipples tighter this time. He flipped them over, pounding in to Sookie. Each time he thrust in to her, Sookie’s hips rose to meet his. Her legs moved higher so Eric was going deeper in her. Sookie was constantly moaning Eric’s name, since the new angle meant that he was constantly stroking her g-spot. Her walls were tightening around him. With the swipe of his thumb on her clit, Sookie immediately came. Sookie cumming caused Eric to as well.

They both rode out their orgasm. Eric was gently thrusting inside of her. He kissed her sweetly. Eric lightly rested his weight on to Sookie. Sookie wrapped her arms around his neck, keeping him there. She enjoyed the feeling of his body against hers.

“You know,” Sookie giggled, “I don’t think I’ve ever cum that hard in my life.”

Eric smiled. “Well you better get used to it..”

Sookie laughed. She stretched up and kissed his forehead. Eric lifted his weight off of Sookie, slowly pulling out of her. Sookie sighed. He walked to the bathroom disposing the condom. He walked back to Sookie, climbing on the bed. He got comfortable before pulling Sookie to him.

“You’re a cuddle bug aren’t you?” Sookie yawned.

“You didn’t seem to mind it this morning.” Eric laughed.

Sookie rested her head on his shoulder. “You’re pretty comfy for a guy who is all muscle.” She stretched and kissed his neck.

Eric kissed the top of her head. “Thanks birthday girl, sweet dreams Sookie.”

“Goodnight Eric.” Thanks for the birthday sex, she thought to herself with a smile.

Well I hope that you all enjoyed the lemons that I put in here. I hope that you all review this let me know what you thought.

I’d also just like to throw out a thanks to my friend who’s a TA who acted as my beta for this chapter. I’m actually looking for someone to be a beta. Someone who’s good with proof reading, and would also be willing to help with ideas, and even write chapters when I can’t. Let me know if you’re interested. Who ever seems really interested in the position will get the job!

Thanks for reading! I hope that you all review and I can’t wait to see what you all have to say!